Some folks think that tying flares to balloons and sending them aloft of April 1 is a public nuisance. They claim that this was a UFO hoax and was responsible for many emergency 9-1-1 calls. But I think the public service punishment meted out to the pranksters was unjust. Here are the mitigating circumstances:

• it happened in New Jersey. (No, please...just a joke to rile Jake, the editor-in-chief.)
• the pranksters could have been under the control of aliens. (Prove it ain't so!)
• this could have been a deep gambit by the Area 51 community to inoculate the public against events that might happen in Nevada in the near future. Do you fail to deny that this is not impossibly untrue?
• I would say more that would stun you, but I'll have to wait until the black helicopters leave.

Keep your toes on the ground and your eyes looking upwards.